The saddest impossibility

Peculiar at first. The way the mind works. Designed such, that survival is top priority.
Growing, it absorbs even the smallest bits of information. And to that end with bits and bobs and other factors, the mind is made.
Not unchangeable but not so malleable either.

A mind made using all the information growing up to meet survival needs.
Survival includes resistance to certain atrocities like murder and torture. Not only from being victim to it but also doing the act itself and also from seeing it.
There are grades or levels of how much violence affects the mind, from peace-lovers who cry at the sight of blood to psychopaths who crave the sight of blood. Simply said, we are all victims and aggressors, to a certain degree, to physical and psychological violence.

The mind is a perfect survival tool, equipped to adapt to any environment whilst growing. So if violence is present in the minds' development stage and victim to it early on, the mind will develop a resistance against it. Now that same mind quite fully developed, will in future see violence of that same degree as something natural of this world. As is strongly suggested in psychopathic studies; having witnessed great violence in their childhood they have grown to adulthood seeking such violence to appease their broken minds somehow.

The point however is that to some degree everyone has psychopathic tendencies. This inevitably leads to one of the saddest truths in a very logical manner.
If there is already violence in the world, it cannot be kept abreast from new generations. Therefore violence will continue on like a chain, passed on from one age to the next.

A hypocrisy will follow where we know in theory such violence is horrendous and unnatural. Yet made natural by our minds designed to survive. We shall turn a blind eye to atrocities if it does not affect us directly so we may carry on our lives 'peacefully'.
Seeking to make the mind an isolated system, free of external influences. Yet that is not possible, and similar to the 2nd law of thermodynamics, the entropy of the universe cannot decrease. It can only increase and as a result things can be said to only get more disorganised or worse.
A world where violence is ignored or worse encouraged. It is a sad world indeed, and the saddest impossibility being it can only get worse with time.
World Peace?
An impossible dream...

As long as we seek peace with others it will at best slow down evil's progression.
What we truly need, is to seek peace within ourselves.
After all; only one can truly change oneself.

To become someone that can shrug off all violence and stop it spreading is to become someone full of compassion only.

Safe

There is a certain gait in a person's stride when their path is bound for home.

Our life is full of attachements that we form over time. The longer the connection, the stronger the attachement.
Home is such an attachement which many of us could not do without.
It is our connection back, to our roots and to our sphere of comfort. Where one would come back to for a lung full of quiet respite.

The journey back is a chance to review your life, the deeds done and the deeds missed. The quests conquered and the times laughed. The moments of stress and anguish; there to haunt you into a lesson learnt.
Although it is not the last journey one will make; it is a checkpoint in life, like an auto save where you can come back to in the future to find yourself. Hence our happy gaiting stride showing our joy to be home bound, overflowing smiles and tender thoughts.
You are home finally, grown up a little more and unmaimed.

You are safe, and that's all that matters

Infinite Desire

It starts small, a small desire which is quickly satisfied...and from there it grows. Bigger and bigger...each time satisfaction coming at greater effort or expense. Until at one point, we find ourselves with desires which cannot be satisfied. Simple desires to our minds, desires our minds have conditioned as 'simple' yet completely unattainable such as peace and unending happiness.
The identifiable danger here is that; 'life' as our minds have become accustomed to, has conditioned us to desire MORE.
Therefore without ends

We seek love, only to find it unreciprocated.
We seek peace, only to find our ears tuned to war.
We seek longevity, only to find life cut short by death.
We seek wealth, only to find ourselves dissatisfied by life.
We seek power, only to find ourselves in fear of losing control.
We seek recognition, only to find ourselves alone; without friends.
We seek happiness, only to find ourselves prone to pain and suffering.

The mind is an infinite source of desires, and our body an instrument to satisfy those desires

It is a never ending path that can be avoided by one way only

Seek not what is bad, for it will turn you bitter.
Seek not what is good, for it will turn you blind.

Seek not a thing and it will set you free...

The furious silence

It is in the loudness of life that we become comfortable in what we do and what we think, it is in the ongoing commotion of never ending actions and reactions that we lose sight of things. And even if we wanted to see things clearly, it would be like trying to hear a whisper in a night club.
We all become accustomed to certain routines, certain repetitive events such that our minds slowly lull us into a false sense of security, its the continual belief that everything will unfold accordingly; so far as our mind can predict the future to a reassuring degree. We fool ourselves into believing that certain things won't change, even if deep down we know it is not true..

This false belief keeps us going for a while, in our carefully planned lives, until we inevitably hit what can be one of the worse feelings one can feel in one's life; a sudden silence.

Its the kind of silence that leaves you stunned for a while, until the shock subsides;
Its a silence that allows us to focus, allows us to see clearly for a while, and all the commotion becomes just a blur and we suddenly know what is most important to us, and knowing that we will lose everything pains us.
There is nothing to do but to mull about the cause of silence, and to REMEMBER, aaah the memories, both cherished and hated, as they will forever be just memories...and none more shall be made...

This silence is felt like a wide gaping hole in your chest, as if a part of you were missing. And no matter how much you clutch at your chest, the hole won't get any smaller.
You can try to make some noise, to remove the instilled silence, but it won't work, it won't be the same, because that who has left, had their own sweet unique music that soothed you.
Now, things will never be the same, not with this furious silence.

The inevitability of death is only unconciously realised by everyday individuals. It is only really conciously realised when someone one knew well; loses voice, loses breathe, loses will...
When the music ends, and the ensuing silence pursues; it is sad beyond belief and you are at a loss...without hope, without guidance and prone to regret.

Death is something every individual faces in their life at one point or another. It seems to creep up on you and surprise you out of your everyday routine. Forces you to ponder on your own life and what would happen if those around you left this world. It is sadness and sorrow that dominates your apparant feelings but fear is also there. Fear because of the unkown, what foreseeable future you had calculated is all but torn and everything is different. The unkown bores fear into everyone and it is this that makes it so much harder for us to deal with death.

Death is sad. But it should not be entirely so, it should not eclipse our purpose. It should not overshadow our being. It is a natural part of our life and it must be accepted. We must understand however, that death is not the end, but another beginning. Just as well as a baby is born into this world, so does another person leave us. It is all but the same door. Only one entering and one exitting.

Death is hard to deal with when we are so attached to life. It is hard because we develop this attachement and make it so. It is hard because we choose it to be so. For it to make sense...we just have to let it all go, and realise that we are not the body, but the soul! That whoever has passed away has progressed only a step further towards being with God, and there can be nothing better than that =)

In the Absence of Time

Some songs are just meant to make your conscious thoughts die.

What is the meaning of meditation if not the elimination of unnecessary thoughts to focus solely on but one precise thought.

There are certain triggers, by way of beats and rhythms that make the mind calm like a bomb.

It will put you into a mode of clarity. In which you may embrace and appreciate what is known as the Present

We are often told that the past will only bring more pain and the future can bring anxiety.

It is important that we focus on the now, the present, the moment.
 

The amazing thing about doing that is that the moment is always changing, the constant change allows for no complacency on your part, you are active and focused, indifferent to past and future. But that moment can also be stopped...it can come to a standstill.

A standstill is a pause, it is a single fraction of a fraction of the smallest unit of time, it is unmeasurable and considered to be independent of time.

That standstill occurs when you transcend all thoughts that are unnecessary for that moment. It is a moment which you will later refer to as 'an amazing time'. That standstill is a loss of perception of time, as time is the eternal factor to everything in existence. To feel something without interference of time is to glimpse upon true happiness.

People do all kinds of things to have a glimpse, they will drink, they will smoke, they will pop, they will fuck, they will choke...all to lose the perception of time whilst keeping feelings alive.

Whilst those methods may bring certain results, they prove to be unhealthy in the long run. To constantly be peeping at what you crave yet always unable to achieve it is a constant agony. A suffering which will plague you forever throughout your many lives.

These glimpses are a far cry from the real thing, the real happiness that is offered in the standstill of time.
 
However in 'reality' a place cannot exist where there is no time.
 So yeah, we're pretty much fucked!
Inside reality that is! ;)

That's why we have heaven! A place not found in 'reality' where time does not exist and where we will forever be Happy!

Bit of a mind-fuck, yeah? But that's not all.

What if I told you that you really were in The Matrix? A world of lies and deceit? A world of illusion where time rules all?

Then the term 'reality' is not exactly what you think it is. The existence of heaven is not surreal anymore.

And the possibility of escape from this world of lies is not impossible...in fact it is very possible and the way to get out is not that complicated.

I have said it many times before and the answer is still the same...the answer lies in True Love :)

How does your prism look like?

Its crystal clear at first, gleaming in the sunlight and shining off with a confidence no one can fake. Its grows like a tree, starting small, but ending big and solid. There is a beauty in its naivety, that all us appreciate, that all of us, deep down, miss sorely. Its a sort of ignorance, a magical place where the stars shine every night and the moon lights up a quiet path for us to tread. It leads to a place of wonder, a marvelous and innocent gem of curiosity; with no flaw whatsoever...

At the same time, it is stupid, idiotic actually...a raw amalgamating knot of emotion; making you hope there is still faith left in humanity. The sheer dumbness of it makes you want to wave it aside, but its not as easy as you think it should be. It's not just a simple matter of putting it aside, there is more to it than that, an attachment, a memory, a feeling. It's like giving up spontaneity and marrying eternal routine and habit until death does you! We all wish to retain the little child inside us, to oppose change and growing up. We all want to be in Peter Pan's circle of friends; to keep the crystal from getting foggy and flawed. To gaze at the stars and moon endlessly without worry...

What many think, is that; there is no choice.There is no deciding when it comes to change, and they are right..Partly! We may not control change, we may not oppose it, but we can guide it. We can gulp it down like medicine or we can mix it up or we can even have some salt and lime with it! We may have to grow accustomed to a morning bright sky and the hot sun, but that doesn't mean we can't see the stars and moon anymore. That doesn't mean we can't take our shard of crystal out once in a while, wipe it clean and stare at it for a little while. Our stone does not need to change from clear crystal to black coal, it need not be so tough all over so it can resist the harsh rays of the sun. We can shape it into something else, something clear, yet hard and strong. Something that will let you gleam light in all its colours despite the sun, something that won't bog you down into boredom and dullness.

We can shape it however we want, and we want the best do we not?
So we'll shape it well, our future, our perception, our attitude towards life and our compassion for others.
The best thing ever; strong yet sensible...like a Diamond =)

A Beautiful Sleepless Night

The dark abounds
When rays are lost
When sounds' asleep
but thoughts are shouting
I go to sleep
when men start croaking
when birds start stirring
and I start yawning.

The rays, they pierce
The sunless morning
The birds, they screech
A mindless greeting
And I awake
Willing sleep to take me
but sleep comes hard
for those who worry
the next wake they face
When most is sweet; in dreams only..

Its in the smile!

Many people do not realise the power of small acts that they usually take for granted. Slight differences in attitude that can change your life, and those of the people around you.
What must be understood beforehand is that, yes everyone has a different life, and some people undergo more suffering than others. But everyone does indeed suffer to a degree. Such is life; but have you ever seen two different people react to the same situation in completely different ways. Where they both suffered the same incident, but one continued to smile while the other was close to completely breaking down? Well thats because all people react differently. The fact that we all have a certain degree of control on how to react is a very important thing to realise, because you can totally avoid uselessly painful circumstances because of it!

Now back to my point; if one was to suffer in great quantity and frequency, they will ultimately come to a fork where they have to decide. Many don't ever realise when they reach that fork of decisions and those are the unlucky who need the help of those around them to see where they are heading. While the others who realise the existence of that fork are tasked to make a very difficult decision that demands huge courage on their part.
To one side of the path, you have self pity and endless regret or guilt. That is the steep downhill path that one can easily find themselves in. A path that will sour the rest of your future life until you decide to get off it. A path that will change and shape your very character and personality...and eventually make you bitter. It will change you into someone who pushes everybody else away, and you will keep on pushing, until at one point everyone will have given up on you and you will remain bitter till the end of your days...trapped by your own hollow thoughts that think only bad of humanity as a whole for giving up on you. In a way, it seems completely hopeless, to help someone as such. But it is not, it is the weak mindedness of people, their lack of faith in themselves and those around them that eventually lead them to think there are hopeless people in this world. However...;

Nothing is devoid of hope

All it takes is some good will, some faith and a little bit of stuborness to get through and shine that small light they need. No one is immune to influence, and when this is said, many people think of negative influence! That in itself is quite sad! Yes there are many events in history that provide evidence and just cause to think in this way, but that does not mean it should be our only way!

Its all to do with our attitude and the way we see things.
Its all to do with how we accept it and deal with it.
Its all to do with the faith we have in others, and more importantly, in ourselves.
It would be unreasonable to say 'never let anything bring you down'.
But not so to say 'don't ever let anything ever keep you down!'
All it takes is one thing, to make it all better again. It will bring others from that putrid path of endless hate, back to the path of faith.
Its definitely worth a try, afterall; it costs nothing, but is worth everything.
Especially when all it takes, is a simple smile =)

REMEMBER more than read, while reading

An alarm rings, its time to wake up, don't feel like it but you know you have to, so you do it anyways.
You get yourself ready, like you've done so many countless times before.
You go wait for the bus, or sometimes for your parents to get into the car, the sun is only lightly glowing at this time but it shines beautifully on the dewy grass.You wait and wait to get to your destination, by now, its dawned on you and you start to really wake up.
You finally arrive, and you grab hold of your bag and slowly make your way down the steps. The same steps you've taken countless times before, and steps you'll surely take as many times again.You meet a few friends, say hi and move to your usual 'spot' or 'place' because thats what everyone did, a habit that changed every year depending on where the morning class was.
Slowly slowly, others start appearing and the sound of  conversation starts to rise.
Some days, crazy things would happen in the morning, like broken window panes, silly mini football matches or little accidents by people arriving that would make the observant others burst into laughter.
The fun would often end with a loud bell, but that would not be the real end. No, things were only starting.
We followed the timetable to the letter the first few years, more out of fear of getting into trouble than actual seriousness.
But the important part of the timetable was the part where we got the grounds to ourselves, we could roam around, looking for whatever adventure our imaginations could offer us given the circumstances and location.
We would mostly go play football, if not talk about just anything and turn it into something funny.
The stuff that would sometimes happen on the football pitch were just absolutely magnificient; from plain old silly actions that made everyone laugh to the serious adrenaline pumping sensation that arose in order to deliver a perfect still moment. Satisfaction through good self play, and better yet, team play.
The bell to that period always sounded so awful, wouldn't ever wanna hear it again!
The next bell to look forward to was that of the end of the learning day. Some years, most of us were anxious to hear that bell ang get home, where we would sit in front of the tv, whether it was to watch cartoons or play video games.Other years, we didn't feel like parting from our friends, or those we kinda liked to keep a special eye on because your heart told you to.
And the next day would be a repeat of the last day, well atleast for the first couple of years.The later years would revolve more about sleepless nights, whether it be due to study or more likely the social chatting, because at this point, meeting at school just wasn't long enough, you needed more assosciation, to the point it looked like addiction.
You learnt alot from sending words to and fro, more sometimes, than actually being with the person. It was quite thrilling at times, maybe not so at other times. But altogether, pretty enriching.
But ofcourse, later on, slowly slowly, you would ask less questions about the person themselves, you've gotten to know them pretty well and at this point, you want their help! Work is getting tougher and tougher, and we all pooled our rescources to make things go along faster!
It got more hectic in the last period. Sometimes everything felt like it was crashing down on you and you just couldn't keep it together anymore, that was when your slow built relationships kicked in and gave you a booster. They helped you now, and you would do the same for them when they needed it. It felt pretty perfect.
You worked damn hard at the end, you had to pull yourselves together, put your pants on properly and just dash forward. You looked at the finish line so hopefully, it would soon all end. But the sad thing was, you only wanted one part of it to end, not the other part...not the part which involved those other people you had come to heartily call friends.

It did end pretty suddenly, and you moved to a new routine, a more relaxed one. You could stay up late, and wake up late. It didn't matter, obligations had disappeared and all you had to do is call up your friends and set up meetings and plans! The finally well deserved break! So you went to your friend's, stayed over, went out, swimming at the beach, renting out a campment, going out clubbing at night. Yes, finally, time to do what you wanted without much hindrance.
You would stick to this routine a good while, savour it while it lasted because like the last stretch of events, it would end.
Surely enough, gradually, people started leaving, going to take their own seperate paths.
You know yours is soon to come, but you don't think much about it.
Until there is no more putting it aside, its your turn to leave and there is nothing much to say about it. Its just what has to be done.

So you embark on a new adventure, you're not sure where it will lead you, but you are well equipped, thanks to your friends and family, so you are not worried.
Maybe just a little bit sad, a little bit sad to leave behind such a tremendous amount. Taking only with you the memories that you know you will cherish for the rest of your life.

Its been a fun ride. You leave with a smile. Nothing more really needs to be said about it. Just the quiet silence to show how much it is worth to you...

The Departed

Its the change, the convoluted and tortuous change that happens out of our control.
It is not against us, nor is it with us. It is neutral and continues on in its infinite neutrality. And thats the worst about it...because how can you in your right mind curse and blame at something neutral? Something that can have no fault, that cannot err and that cannot choose otherwise. That which dictates the parting of ways...

They all seem to let those words part from their mouths so freely, and when I hear those words I realize how I am in restraint from utterring the same words. How I refuse to say the same words, how I hesitate, how I know that they will not hold...like making a promise you know you won't keep. But those words come from our hearts, our hopes. Because whats better than the known? the comfortable? the easy? the pleasure you have come to continually experience with the familiarity you gained over the years? But no, its about to change, the familiar will be left behind to be replaced by the unfamiliar and we will have to wade through the unclear waters we fear. For we cannot see the bottom of it, what lies beneath and what the current will make drift our way...

Do you remember? That familiar feeling on your skin, the familiar sense of being when wearing that white shirt with the school badge...the uniform that made us feel one and forced us to look deeper to find similarities and differences, interminably forcing us to know each other better and letting us grow closer. Creating those bonds you don't want to let go, those bonds that you fear you may never ever create again with other people...afterall, they wouldn't understand, they don't know what you were and what you have become...not like those of us who wore those white shirts, waking up everyday to meet up and laugh in the early morning, while the grass was still dewy and the sun shining lightly on our faces. Anxious for your friends to show up in those registration classes so you can get joking and laughing already, ready to face a whole day of lessons alongside them, moving with each bell that rung the start and end of a little adventure.

Here we are. Past it all, new routines and all, ready-ing ourselves for a new start - if not already in the fray, apart from each other, we will be far from the familiar, close to the unkown and we will have to start again.
I just hope its gonna be as awesome as it was last time...'cuz I gotta say;
It was one helluva good time!! :]

Swallow Your Ego

We have all come into situations of conflict that flew by so quick that it makes you wonder what the hell just transpired? That shook you from a good and cozy mood into one of anger or sadnesss. Its a moment of weakness, where you just gave in to your raw emotions and made you think selfishly.
Like:
"hang on a sec, why am I taking this crap from this person? I don't need to!? What the hell am I doing? They should just piss off and stop making me feel bad, I haven't done anything wrong so why do I feel like i'm being looked down on? Why does that person talk to me in such a way to make me feel inferior?".

And in that instant you react to your thoughts and feelings, you end up hurting that person and you can even justify it. But not too long afterwards, you become 'yourself' again. The self that everyone knows you to be and the self you always assumed you were, but where did that dark side come from? That action based solely on instinct?You start to realise what you have just done, the consequences, the impact...the wrong.

That person didn't deserve what you just said, you were suppose to be there for them. Especially if they might have their own problems at the moment. So how can you assure that person that you want to be there after cracking that one instance? How to reassure that person that you did not mean to? Does it mean you have to get on all fours to beg and say sorry? Doesn't that just bring you back into an endless loop of "why am I on all fours? I don't have to take this crap from this person, why am I apologizing?..."
And thats where it gets us, kills us even...fucking ego! We just have to learn to swallow it and move on. Because no matter how bad it may feel, it will ALWAYS, and I mean ALWAYS seem so stupid and worthless when you think back on it...shameful even! 

"Even the most genuine people have their demons. You know, you look at others and you see their flaws. "Oh this person is shallow." "Oh this person is creepy." And you think that what you are is perfection in a sense, but you're not. Even if you wish or think you aren't affected by judgmental people, you are, to some extent. But I find that with me, it's like a mood, or a temporary emotion. A state of mind where your ego takes over and swallows you whole, exposing the ugly part of you. After a moment, you can regain control and see how petty you were for giving in.
Sometimes, these moments of weakness are a healthy thing. It shows you that you must fight for what you believe in, sometimes even with yourself. Even with what you were conditioned to believe. That's when you know you found yourself. The real you. The person people haven't told you you should be. The person no other soul aspired. Just you."

The Darkness Without

The light in the horizon, suddenly extinguished by a momentary eclipse which forewarns a future danger.
You see the shadow being cast, but you refuse to believe it is only momentary, and you prepare yourself for eternal darkness.
But its not something done lightly, for when you prepare for eternal darkness, you must shed the light you hold. And so you try to cast away the apparant light you have within you. You change substantially, becoming someone you once swore to never become. Once you lower your standards, there is no raising them again. You are stuck forever with the darkness you sought, but there is still hope...as the eclipse elapses and there is light again.
Shining straight on you, revealing who you are and leaving you bare, naked in the sunlight for everyone to see you for who you are, but more importantly for you to see what you have become. Disgusting and tainted, something even you do not want to see, nevermind others.
You feel everything is lost and you don't know what to do. Its not the end of the world, and thats the worst of it, because you feel at your own end while everything is just seamlessly going on ahead.
All is not lost however, because as you found out about the temporary darkness, so is everything else just temporary. And you get better eventually, only through realization and detachement.

It seems like an eternity, until you find yourself again, and you start again. But its not like before, you lost your light, but you grow a new one. Maybe not as white as the last one, but a light nonetheless...It doesn't matter what colour your light is, you all have one, and with it do you crave to share and receive the light of others, the love you seek is unsatisfactorily provided by others and you move on and on seeking more and more of that tight gut feeling that makes you do crazy things.

Ultimately, you look up. For something thats worth it all, for something fulfilling. And you are not wrong when you seek love.
Its just that you were searching in the wrong place, it was there all along, inside you...

Cherishable Memories

I REMEMBER

Times of Pain. Times of Happiness. Times of Sadness. Times of Laughter. Times of Silence. Times of Peace. Times of Frustration. Times of Satisfaction. Times of Anxiety. Times of Relief. Times of Fear. Times of Excitement. Times of Disappointment. Times of Courage. Times of Despair. Times of Bewilderment. Times of Shock. Times of Pride. Times of Embarrasment. Times of Indifference.

Times of...Inconceivable feelings that are impossible to communicate to others. All inside of you, just there for you to remember...a reminder of who you were and what you've experienced, making you who you are today.

Through pain, suffering and hardships do we create bonds of trust. And through association of each other, do we laugh and make the times count.

I REMEMBER.

Times I will never forget for the rest of my life. Times that I will forever cherish...why? Because you all were in them, making them the best memories I may ever have :)

Nothing is as simple as it seems...nor is it as complicated

We have started hitting the hard times...where we might feel lost, or distant to those we were so close to.
Whether it be physically or emotionally...nothing is like it was before...in those days where we would wake up every morning and go to school...meet those we cherished! But now things have changed...

What we had stowed away for so long, kept in the closet...denied the possibility...that someday; it will end. And we were not wrong to do so! Because how can you hope to take pleasure in something if all you think about, is "when it will end?"
And then you find yourselves in a tight spot...where you feel your closest friends...aren't 'close' afterall. Where you might feel lonely after you thought it was impossible because you had such great friends.
Yes I am talking about the good school times, the good parties and nights spent at your friend's house. I am talking about your loved ones whom will be teared from your arms not because they did wrong or you did wrong...but because of circumstance!

The worse thing about this...is that no one is at fault, no one is to blame! So how do you get over it? How do you move on? When there is no easy way to just blame the person and say they were this and that so you feel better! Its not easy to blame circumstance! To pin it all on something that does not react and show you it is hurt, so that ultimately you feel better...the only choice you have is slowly letting go!
And although the void might never be filled throughout your life if it ends so...there is no choice but to just move on...to simply live.

Often we get to choose between the 'easy' and the 'tough' path...what's worse is when you don't get to choose at all, and you can only sit back and watch it crumble in front of your eyes! But is that really the case...?

After all this time spent together...are you just going to watch it slowly break into little pieces? Whatever happened to all the fun and happiness so far?
No, I am not telling you things can be like they were before...but what i'm saying is that things don't have to be as grim as they seem!

You are who you are today because of the people you have shared the journey with so far...and if circumstance dictates that you must take seperate paths, then so be it. Just remember that you wouldn't be able to take the path alone confidently, were it not for them in the first place...

The Deeper Struggle...

There are periods in our lives...where we are changed...simple moments that change our whole perception like a paradigm shift.

Those moments may make us feel happy or ostensibly depressed, oh! how the ups and downs of life juggle your self existence like a grain of sand in the desert.
How do we maintain our sanity when we realise there is a bigger picture...that there is always something greater than ourselves. That the petty dealings of our daily life make no impact on the world. What then is the meaning of living...living out your life whether it be fun or harsh?

When you see it all in a different perspective...how can you not stop yourself and forgive all that you hate and simply love the way things are, the way people are...and the way you are!
Its all there...the god given gift; the ability to love all unconditionally. It is our minds, corrupted by the illusions of power and control that divert us from our peaceful path and cause us to stray into situations that force us to choose other paths leading farther into the mist where nothing can be seen clearly.
And so do we all become blind to life, and get tangled up in our own problems as we can only see a few feet in front of us. At some point, we forget we entered the mist...and think that it was always there, and we don't remember to try to get clear of it and search for the clarity we were born with.

Only when it is too late do we see where we erred. When the tongues of fire lick our skin whilst also clearing the mist, thence do we see our mistakes and wish we would have realised sooner that we were in fact lost and blinded.
And so when we experience those unique moments...when you feel euphoric or have an epiphany...the mist seems to clear and we feel like we are flying above it...where we see our counterparts repeating the same mistake inside the mist, again and again...there do we realise that there is not much for us to do but help and love.

Yes, help and love, be kind and understanding and tolerate! Oh there can be no limits to tolerance, we should tolerate like a tree and it doesn't matter if we are cut down...because it is not us who is actually being cut down...but the axeman. Whom with every stroke of the sharp blade, is slowly chipping away what clarity and love they have.

I do believe that our own decisions shape us into who we are...and if that special moment you decide to love and to be forgiving, then there is nothing you will ever need to be afraid of.

Life encompasses all of us, and there is nothing for us to do but live it. And we all want to live it happily...but how to attain happiness? Its all about letting go, letting go of all attachment so we might navigate the mist unburdened...and along the way, catch other peoples hands and bringing them along with you. 
With nothing but love and faith and our hands held tightly...will we escape the vicious circle of hatred and suffering to attain liberation from all worldly attachments.

Chance...and seizing it!

Do you believe in chance? or do you think its all fate?
If its all up to fate...then doesn't that mean we have no choice?
And if you believe we have free will...doesn't that mean that fate and destiny doesn't exist!
It all seems very black and white...some believe in free will because they refuse to accept their choices are predetermined.
While others would rather believe in fate, that things happen because they are meant to...I guess they are the romantic type!

People often say you should 'go for it' and you have nothing to lose...is that really true? Is there really nothing to lose?
I think there is always something to lose...whether its something as materialistic as money, or something deeper like a part of yourself? As we take decisions, we are constantly evolving, shedding parts of ourselves and creating new ones.
Will your decision destroy an old outdated part of you and replace it with a more up to date and appropriate aspect of you? Will you ever be able to go back to who you were?

Is it fate; that you are shaped into who you are today?
Or are you who you are today because of your prior decisions?

There's no reason to decide which one you believe in...but then again...maybe deciding on one of the two will change you somewhere? =p

Search for Epinephrine distributors

Why does our blood pump with excitement when we feel the sudden surge of power propelling us forward. The quick change in speed, as we accelerate forever (seemingly) forward until terminal velocity...whereupon:

In that instant, intent only to reach the horizon. To go on and on without ever stopping, towards the infinite end of light's pathway.
As we rush towards the point where parallel lines meet, devoid of thought...absorbed in that existential moment where speed is all that matters.

Engrossed in the infinite meaning of NOW. Those inconceivable fractions of time that we call MOMENT, that is inexplicable, but which we all experience and feel for different things in our own way:

If it be the speedy dribbling past multiple football opponents to score the perfect goal
If it be the exhilarating moment when you cycle down dangerous terrain at intense speed
If it be the perfect sniping headshot in a game of search and destroy in Call of Duty
If it be the last step you take to cross the line in a 100m sprint to arrive barely before your rival
If it be the instant at which you see the perfect blossoming of the Sakura trees
If it be the beat change at 6:45 minutes on 'Strobe' by Deadmau5
If it be the frame at which the climax of the film is shown
If it be the second you stop after a long marathon when the dead alive feeling takes over
If it be the conception of the perfect idea to solve a complex problem
If it be the realization that the screen will go black before you see the outcome of the spinning top in Inception
If it be the slow motion of a golf ball bound for the hole-in-one
If it be the solution to a system of numbers in mathematics
If it be the heart pounding moment when fear grips you in a horror movie
If it be the split second you maneuver to avoid hardcore collision
If it be the exact fit of a gorgeous high heel shoe you've been dying to try
If it be the sensation of gradually increasing to Mach-3 speed
If it be the sudden tightness felt on your foot when you pull hard on your football shoe laces just before a match
If it be the 4.5 G-Force feeling precedent of a sudden drop down on an amusement ride
If it be the flipping of the last card to reveal your perfect Royal Flush
If it be...

Any moment in our perceivable dimension, at which our minds reach for singularity, where past and future are non-existent and the worries associated do not exist.

 A perfect instantaneous moment...